Children never know just how fortunate they are until youth is done. We pay top dollar every Wednesday for people to hold spinning wheels in their mouths and stare back into our eyes while we pee in their faces. Our kids just have to walk up to the Wall-Mounted training urinal, whip out Tinky-Winky, and let it fly.
True, thanks to its super-strong suction cup hanger, we could just as easily buy our own and adjust it to the ideal grown-up height. However, we can’t help but worry those unblinking eyes would make us feel a bit “judged” looking straight forward from that perspective.
Hey, piss-pal: our face is up here.
Oh, well. At least peeing on a twirling target instils the sniper-like discipline to control one’s hose during drainage. Until you mop up a public men’s room, you cannot entirely appreciate just how many fellows grew up being taught that “ready, fire, aim” is the only way to go.