This “The Walking Dead” Walker Zombie Print Torso Apron reminds us time and again that there’s one surreal image we crave that we’ll never see on AMC’s unprecedented prime-time apocalyptic horror hit: a shambling corpse with some taste.
Seriously, that may be the greatest tragedy Robert Kirkman and company have woven so far. What’s the point of having nothing of any importance to do but eat if you can’t chomp something dripping with flavor?
We’ll wear this gruesome officially licensed bib with pride, knowing there are things far more richly fulfilling than reason, emotions, a conscience or even breath and a heartbeat that separate us from a clumsy, flesh-starved zombie horde: mesquite. Hickory. Cedar. Every Georgia man, woman and child knows, it is barbecue that distinguishes man from animal, In the grand arrangement of Mother Nature’s backyard cookout, we are not the brisket!