Triumph The Insult Comic Dog Invades Trump Inauguration, Declares “Betty White Rules”

It isn’t an established “rule of the internet” but it damn well should be: if it exists, Triumph the Insult Comic Dog can poop on it. Newly sworn-in President Donald Trump is about as far from an exception as any one person could be.

The acerbic, hilarious cigar-chomping canine puppet proudly represented Conan O’Brien’s hit TBS late-night show at Trump’s unforgettably awkward inauguration Jan. 20 and brought nothing less than his A-game to 2017’s apogee of “laugh because it’s better than crying” like his entire life had trained him for this moment.

“If a Walmart could vomit, this is what it would look like.”

To be fair, for all the classic Triumph one-liners that hit home to take just a little piss out of the modest throngs of Trump faithful who turned out on the overcast occasion, a surprisingly warm reception for the caustic canine threw Conan’s favorite improvisational correspondent just barely off his game. To see what happened when Triumph ignited an exercise in bipartisan unity with the universal truth, “Betty White rules,” check out the video.

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