Star Wars Mist Machines Finally Give Us Use For Those Dead Stormtroopers’ Helmets

From Turkish Transformers to a working backyard recreation of the furnaces of Isengard and a barbecue the size of a Hummer, if it belches smoke, we want a dozen units of it.

If you can’t tell from our most recent posts, we’re also quite fond of gently improving the Star Wars saga within the warmth of our personal head-canons. After taking a good long look at these Star Wars Mist Machines, it’s no great leap to imagine the Ewoks lighting up something inside the helmets of a cremated Darth Vader and dozens of dead Stormtroopers, either just to add some mystic atmosphere around their celebratory bonfires or to Yub their Nubs to a sweet buzz until Wicket looks around him 12 hours later chirping about wanting to know where the Funyuns went.

This Halloween, set the mist rolling out of one of these babies to make sure every Poe, Rey, and Finn that comes to your door runs off to send little Chewies, Leias, and Hans to see the sweet fog pouring off the heads of a dead Sith Lord and his cannon-fodder soldiers. Just add tap water and let it cycle through Sith Red, Jedi Blue, and Rebellion Orange light accents before shining all three at once.

We can just imagine some little five-year-old Stormtrooper coming to our door and seeing the smoky helmets, us answering dressed as “Return Of The Jedi” Luke Skywalker, and coldly warning them, “Run. Tell the First Order what you saw here today. Tell them, we remember Alderaan, Obi-Wan, and Han.”

Every Nov. 1, we wash trails of pee off our doorsteps. Every year, there’s more leftover candy for us.



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Smokin' !!!!

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