You might call it “make-believe” when we strap on this Jetpack Backpack and run around a Walmart parking lot making “Whoosh!” noises with our arms outstretched. We call it “dressing for the job we want: flying nerd-blogger sidekicks to Cliff Secord, The Rocketeer.”
Please, learn from our horribly disfigured hindquarters. No matter how much more “realistic” it might make them, do not stuff the thrusters with Roman candles. This sweet tote is plenty cool enough when the rocket pockets are filled with school essentials, snacks, gadgets, and the like to get you through the day. This bag is the most mission-ready supply carrier a kid or kid-at-heart could hope to carry.
That is, it will be right up until we graduate from testing our working prototype on drugged monkeys and launch an actual toddler into the stratosphere as proof of concept. Where will we get enough children for repeated test flights, you ask?
It’s really pretty simple: our big, devoutly Catholic families can’t count to 20 among themselves without a Mulligan or two, but they can multiply all day long like the Pope will croak if they stop.