Inner Selfie Stick Is Everything Wrong With The World

Dear Good People of Firebox,

WHAT IN THE SWEET VALLEY HIGH HELL DID YOUR MOTHERS DO TO YOU?

Love,
The Human Race

We have just reached either peak selfie or the hopeless abyss human attention whoring. Ladies and Gentlemen, much like what should be your resigned action if ever caught in the act of using the Inner Selfie Stick, it is exactly what it looks like: a VGA-quality (640×480) camera with a 14mm head that emerges from a 13.97-cm-long insertion tube capable of extending up to 110 cm for the purpose of showing anyone you should unfortunately choose a glimpse of your inner peace.

Oh, and look! It’s FaceTime-compatible.

Yes, with a cable extending over 2 meters in length, there is no recess of the child inside that you can’t let out to play. Of course, auteurs of the Roto-Rooter School of Cinematography will be delighted to know the the Inner Selfie Stick is 100% waterproof and comes packaged with a complimentary 4.5 oz. bottle of lubricant.

Why! Why! Why!

Inner-Selfie-Stick-1

2 Total Score
The Human Race Is Doomed

User Rating: 3.63 (3 votes)
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