After reading the following, you may ask yourself and even us, “Did that really need to be said?”
Our succinct rebuttal? Damn right, it does: this four-foot-wide inflatable Giant Whoopee Cushion Pool Float does not actually pass its gas when you plant your ass on it.
Are we disappointed? No. When Mom told us Dad didn’t so much “get shot down and killed over Vietnam” as “get caught playing ‘Hide the Fenway Frank’ with a hot dog vendor in a bathroom during Game 6 of the 1986 World Series,” we were disappointed. Curious, but mostly disappointed.
This leaves “disappointed” in the dust. You don’t show us a massive whoopee cushion we can inflate and sprawl ourselves across and then tell us it won’t propel us skidding across a body of water with a titanic fart. Tell us, did our dreams really deserve to die?
Perfect for your next summer poop party… ahem.. pool party.