Donald Trump Garden Gnome Will Keep Out Undocumented Critters From Your Yard
Nobody builds kitschy garden gnomes better than Garden Gnome World, believe us. They will build a great 10-inch-tall Trump Gnome and make customers who want one pay for it. Mark our words.
This gnome is long and beautiful, as would be various other parts of its body if it were not, you know, a gnome. It would be “YOOGE” and you all know it. After all, look at those hands. Those are not small hands. The important fact is, if Trump Gnome had a penis, this guy would surely be a tripod. Don’t believe the fake news telling you otherwise.
More importantly, everyone who has had a garden knows there are tons of critters running around wild taking jobs away from landscapers and the veggies that don’t belong to them. With the Donald Trump garden gnome standing guard, there will be an virtual wall of fear for your yard in our new world America order.
Trust this chinless, immaculately coiffed forest creature to make any space from your yard to your desk great again, complete with an appropriately red cap to keep crows from attacking the woodland companion that crawled onto his scalp and died.
No home with all the best gnomes is complete without this one to make all the rest want to apologize on behalf of the entire yard.