By the time Halloween is over, Christmas strikes us as so….anti-climactic. There’s no blaming Santa Claus or anything, but what a wonderful celebration of all the world’s most wonderfully weird, hedonistic and just purely fun things that hide away until the leaves catch fire on the trees, the air turns to a hoodie-ready crispness, and everybody everywhere decides that every-damn-thing should taste like pumpkin.
This year, Burger King appears ready to take cues from the fascination with its Japanese restaurants’ curiously blackened “Kuro Burgers” and introducing junk food from Hell’s bleakest void to North American locations.
Not that it won’t seem redundant from the photos seen here, but when we say “blackened”, the descriptor isn’t referencing bold Cajun spices. Though that too sounds positively delicious – a scintillating new taste, just in time for Mardi Gras 2016, perhaps – we’re talking buns infused with bamboo coal, cheese colored with spuid ink, and pepper-encrusted meat.
If you’re already tenderizing your beef to the thought of gorging yourself on culinary food-things that look like their conjuring from some Lovecraftian pit was subsidized by BP, beware a few catches, For one thing, the Burger King himself must have a weird hard-on for l33t-speak: for Cthulu-knows-what reason, the chain has reportedly dubbed the rumored North American Kuro-cousin the “HA.1.LOWEEN Whopper”, because…reasons. Second, early reports suggest a pared-down take on the Japanese original limited to a bun roughly the color of pumpernickel and none of sacred, peppery cow-flesh of its predecessor.
Finally, for as much sense as this move would make given the viral buzz that the Kuro Burger sparked when it debuted last year, this is not yet a confirmed reveal. This tidbit hatched not by way of a royal proclamation from the King Himself, but Reddit user BKLeaks. Burger King representatives themselves haven’t actually made an official statement yet – possibly after being more or less publicly embarrassed by McDonald’s shooting down their social media-driven envoy to splice iconic sandwiches into the limited-time-only McWhopper in the name of charity.
Source – the Street