The Beach Vault is so remarkably simple and handy, if we hadn’t seen the website ourselves, we’d have sworn we had just been duped into singing the praises of one of Joel Hodgson or Mike Nelson’s “Mystery Science Theater 3000” invention exchanges.
For every group of fun-seekers that takes to the beach, there’s that one friend. While everyone else rampages down the sand to eat, drink, play, swim, and splash, someone has to keep a watchful eye on everyone else’s stuff. Sure, it’s no big deal if there’s someone who just wants to stake a claim to some shade to recline in with a good book or a device with Netflix and a generous data allowance. Not everyone has that kind of luck, however. Sometimes, it’s someone saddled with wallet-watch by virtue of being the last one to hit the sand or the one with the deepest tote.
Never fear being that poor sap again. The Beach Vault itself doubles as handy storage and transportation for the essential included pillow and specially designed blanket. After unloading the latter two parts, dump every little personal effect you’ve been sworn to keep guard over into the Beach Vault and screw it into the sand. Next, lay out the blanket and attach its cut-out hole over the storage opening. Finally, slip the pillow into the blanket’s accompanying sleeve.
There you have it. Everyone’s crap is safely and securely out of plain sight beneath your head while you lounge but still easily accessible at a moment’s need. You are literally a human shield. A beer-drinking, chicken-eating, ray-catching, paperback-reading human shield.
The Beach Vault is currently available for pre-orders and set to ship nationwide on Aug. 30, 2016.