Some of the very best Halloween decorations are the ones that never outlive their usefulness after a single month on display.
Tired of tattering some cheese cloth to hang on wires from a tree to litter your lawn with ghosts? Well, lucky you: we know a guy who knows a ghoul that Hades, Lord of the Underworld himself, owed a favor. That’s how Unique Hunters and Spirit Halloween bring you replicas of the Lapdog of the Damned himself, Cerberus!
We’ve named ours Corporal Cutie-Poots.
If you can name a time of year when life isn’t multitudes more awesome with a three-headed, fog-spewing dog to welcome visitors to your abode, then we congratulate you – somehow, you have proven joy to be a completely expendable element of life as we know it. These little fearsome sound-and-motion-activated snookums of darkness even pop their jaws of sharp teeth and emit bowel-loosening growls that grow more intense as their throats glow and their animatronic bodies begin to shake.
Forget Halloween. Are you ready for the very best door-to-door Girl Scout cookie season ever? We’ll take four boxes of Thin Mints, two boxes of Samoas, oh, AND YOUR SWEET, DELICIOUS IMMORTAL SOULS TO CHEW AND TOY WITH FOR ALL ETERNITY. Do you take checks? We’re super-hungry.
Fog machines are sold separately.