Every baby is just one or two critical life choices at any given time away from becoming an elite underworld assassin. No living thing on Earth is born so innately adept as a wrinkly human clone ejected from a woman’s nethers at “making it look like an accident.”
No, that is not “the drugs talking.” Not this time.
What inspires us to such an “outlandish” claim, you ask? Simple. Each of us has two functional eyes. Go ahead, take a long look at these 30 hilariously ill-fated photos of babies. The photographers and parents meant each and every last one to exude an air of unfettered innocence and heartwarming purity.
Sadly, nobody read the infants in on this.
If you examine some of these snapshots at just the right angle, you can see the little roly-poly, chubby-cheeked shit machines let just the faintest satisfied smirk slip right after pissing, crapping or puking on one of the people who gave the ungrateful little weapon of mass defecation life in the first place. You would almost swear from their wide-eyed amazement that they had only just discovered in that singular instant how to weaponize bodily fluids.
They knew. We know they knew. Never take your eye off a baby.
Source – TheAwesomeDaily